The woman we lost recently was my grandmother…our grandmother. But she was not our grandma. The past few years have seen the woman we knew as grandma thrown in to shadow by her health.
My cousins and I have compiled some of our memories of grandma to share with you and there is a common theme:
We choose to remember happier times.
We choose to remember the woman we grew up with who was always full of life and unlimited ideas for days out, armed with her camera and a handbag full of extra strong mints. To remember the jokes and the laughter. Everything that she taught us. And her absolute insistence on keeping all of us right!
We choose to remember the woman who had so many memories of her own to share in the form of hoarded objects hidden away in drawers and cabinets for us to find while helping to organise. She had so many things collected from over the years, each with a story attached that she took great joy in telling. And we would jump at the chance to listen…even if only for an excuse to stop working!
She would let the three eldest of us, who lived locally, stay over at her house and she would go crazy when we would run up and down the hall to jump on the bed in the end bedroom. And the night would be followed by shock when she woke us up in the morning with her parrot, Max, on her shoulder. Sometimes we would feed Max for her, give him showers with the hosepipe in the garden, and let him sit on our shoulders while he chattered and whistled.
Some of us had the opportunity to go with grandma to golf competitions. Seeing her in her element, taking photos of the golfers, was very special. She once took the three eldest on a trip to Blackpool. We thought we were going to have a great time on the beach and at the theme park but, of course, ended up at the Women’s Open taking yet more photographs. She did make sure we got a ride on the Big Dipper and an ice cream though! And she was very careful to make sure it was in that order!
I think everyone who knew grandma was aware of how determined she was. There were occasions she’d drive some of us up to Scotland to visit our cousins. Even when the rain was so heavy that we could barely see out of the windscreen. She wanted to be at all of our graduations even if it meant travelling the full length and breadth of the country, sometimes by herself. The growing collection of photos celebrating our achievements that now line the hall we used to run up and down are testament to how proud she was of all of her grandchildren.
Our grandma was an intelligent and independent woman with a smile and a twinkle in her eye.
That’s the woman we choose to remember.